Celebrating the true essence of giving during the holidays

Thanksgiving is a way to give thanks and giving to the Divine, to people, to yourself. Nobody wants wars, or division, or separation. Our need to protect ourselves is much greater than our need to fight. When the American Indians found out there was no war, they sat with the pilgrims and celebrated.

We are living in a time where few people believe in love and that’s why there are more people who celebrate war. After all, we need to blame somebody for all the pain we have.

The difficult part of removing blame and war from our lives is that we have to be in unity. When we agree that we have unity among us, we become the same. When we become the same, we fear we are losing our identity. Once we lose our identity, we have no ego. To make a very sweet drink the sugar has to dissolve. Once the sugar dissolves the drink becomes sweet. If you see the sugar at the bottom the drink won’t be sweet and it’s almost like its fighting the liquid not to be mixed with it. In our times, the diversity, lack of unity, and fights among people does not create “thanks” or “giving.” We must together find unity with people who we might not necessarily want to talk to, sit with, or have dinner with.

The word for dinner in the ancient language of Hebrew is called Seuda, which means support. This means that while we eat, we are supposed to support each other emotionally and be together.

In our days, because of all the social media, it is very hard to look one another in the eyes. Thanksgiving is about saying to ourselves that we would rather have more love towards people then we fear or hate them. We want to transform hatred and blame into love and responsibility. That is what we want to achieve because once we achieve this, the reward is loving ourselves. For that I would like to say thanks and do a lot of giving and charity for others because through that, I will be able to recognize the good within me. After all, if you don’t see the good within yourself, you can never love yourself. There are people we meet who don’t necessarily make us happy, but if we find one good thing within those people, we will be able to find one good thing within ourselves.

There’s not a more important time than now to celebrate Thanksgiving loudly.

Finding the capacity to love after the Tree of Life Synagogue tragedy

WASHINGTON: While preparing this week’s Torah portion, which has to do with the birth of Esau and Jacob, I cannot get out of my mind the devastating event that occurred at the Tree of Life Synagogue in Pittsburgh. Our hearts go out to them. The tragedy comes from the same jealousy and hatred that has existed since the time of Cain and Abel, and Esau and Jacob. It still pervades the soul of humankind. Enmity against another continues to fuel the lust to destroy the lives of others out of jealousy and self-righteous hatred of others. We must increase our capacity to love

People, in the name of hatred, still convince themselves of the
justification of taking a human life.

As I write this message with a heavy heart following the Tree of Life tragedy, I want to take this opportunity to reach out to as many people as possible. I beg you, especially those of you who have been victims of hatred and jealousy themselves, to understand that if someone hates or dislikes you, the answer is to move on. We cannot change our enemies. We can only change ourselves and the response within our own hearts and minds.

To do that requires, no, demands, the purging within our own souls any desire for revenge, or hatred. If feelings of injustice. To be able to forgive our enemies. It’s not that we agree with their actions, but we agree with love, not hate.

When Cain killed Abel, or when Esau wanted to kill Jacob, they didn’t feel they were doing it for the wrong reason, they thought they were doing it for the right reason.

Hatred’s right and just reasons wither before our capacity to love
Unfortunately, most acts of crime happen because the perpetrator feels it’s for a right and just reason. Whether through mental illness or out of plain hatred, that is why they don’t stop. As difficult a task as it is we must individually break the hellish cycle of hatred. And to do that, we must break the cycle within ourselves.

We have to stop justifying reasons to be jealous or another. Or to hate each other. We need to activate within us a higher vision of possibility. Find a way to open our hearts to the good in one another.

Tree of Life Synagogue shooting: The right way for Jews, and non-Jews, to fight back
We must also restrict the inclination to fuel our own tendency toward bitterness. Bitterness, and the accompanying hate that is too often the response to a tragedy.

To the degree that we are unable to elevate our individual love, on a consciousness level, we all remain responsible for what happened in Pittsburgh. Until we can relinquish our own hatred within, we remain plagued by the experience of hatred around us.

May this message underscores the urgency for our own personal transformation toward forgiveness, love and compassion even for those that hate. The people of Pittsburgh are uniting in response to hatred with compassion for their neighbor, there is no better message to the world to help us heal.

Being Busy or Fulfilling Our Life’s Purpose

Do you think we make ourselves busy as a society in general and if so why? Does this effect our happiness and if so, how?
Our universe has different types of people so I wouldn’t answer this answer as yes or no. This answer is based on the type of persona you are. The type of persona has to do with things we did in a previous lifetime.

If we believe in the Divine or any other form of high power, we can understand that there are people who make themselves busy and there are people that the universes keeps busy. The big question is are you busy to accomplish what you came here to do or are you busy just to kill another hour of your time in this physical universe because you don’t have that much joy in your life.

The first type are people who are meant to be busy and to accomplish what they couldn’t accomplish in their past lifetime. Those specific people will have the pressure to do something spiritual that everyone else will benefit from. The purpose here is not the pressure but the time management and the accomplishment . If you feel and know, and have witnesses around you that feel and see that you are beginning to accomplish more and more things that other people benefit from, this type of thing is wonderful and more things will keep you busy that will bring joy and happiness to people around you.

There is another type of persona who are addicted to being busy, meaning they are avoiding what they are meant to do here and just want to be seen as busy because they are avoiding the real spiritual work they came to do. For example in extreme; your kids need your help with homework and you stay an extra hour at work just not to deal with the attention you need to give your kids.

Happiness is a result of accomplishing what you came here to do. It is very important to seek out an astrologer, psychic or mentor, to help you find your purpose. If you don’t keep yourself busy for the sake of your real purpose in life, you will be miserable and won’t accomplish anything and as a result you will keep yourself busy so you don’t have to confront your real work.

What is the best way to fix this issue?
The way we fix the issue of people wanting to be busy for the sake of being busy is by asking them and suggesting to them to ask themselves this powerful question: what is your essence of being? What are your trying to accomplish? As it is written in the song of Rabbi Elkabatz, a famous Kabbalist from 500 years ago, the end of every action starts with a single thought. Before you start making yourself busy, think what is your purpose. If not you will find yourself just being busy for killing more time during the day. The solution is as simple as it sounds. Ask yourself what’s my real purpose here? If it’s money, what’s the amount? Buying a house? Am I getting there? Work? Am I getting ahead? You have to see that every action, thought and conversation are leading you towards your goal. When you find out what it is, you are in the right direction.

Why is the need to be still and less busy important for a person?
The need to be still and less busy is a form of meditation. Some form of looking within to see am you are in the right direction. Try to imagine yourself as if you are driving on the wrong highway, wrong direction, and you keep moving. The faster you drive you move further away from your destination. If you stop on the side and think and meditate and analyze where you are and where you need to go, there’s a better chance you will get there. Same with life, you need to find out for yourself are you in the right direction? If yes, you don’t need to be still, just keep on going with excitement and happiness. If not, it’s time to be still, relax, meditate and either change your direction or find out why are you here.

Any advice other advice you can share for living in a more simple and happy way?
Every person is born with a gift and talent from God but even diamonds that fall into the mud get dirty. In the end, it’s still a diamond, it doesn’t change. A diamond stays a diamond. We as humans are different types of shapes and sizes of diamonds created by the Divine. Sometimes we fall into the deep mud and we get dirty because of our egos, anger and different types of selfish behavior. At that moment we can’t be simple or happy. If we just realized we are still perfect the way the Divine created us and all we need to do is to remove the layers of mud around us, we will find happiness and simplicity right away. For that reason, if you ask me how to live a simple and happy life I suggest that within us there is an amazing beautiful baby that refuses to grow. Make sure at least five minutes a day to be as silly as a baby. Smile and laugh for no reason. Choose a hobby. I recommend reading my Daily Affirmations book or any other book that can make you laugh. Remember when you fall to sadness it’s not you, it’s the mud covering you. When you take a shower and remove the mud you will discover your true happiness from within.

Navigating the In-between

A few years ago I was driving from the big city of Manhattan to the East Hamptons to give a spiritual lecture and mediation on Reincarnation. Those of you who know the road, if you don’t know Long Island, you might get lost.

I saw a husband and wife who kept fighting about what was the right direction to reach the destination. I was thinking how I could be of help. As I got closer to them and opened the window, they were not very interested in receiving my help.

That brought to my attention that it doesn’t matter how much you know a person or how long you have lived with them, when a moment of making decisions of right and wrong and who is right and who is wrong comes, things can sometimes go wrong. We might find the path to Long Island but end up getting divorced in the end.

How do we get to a place that no matter what is happening around us we both win. Is there such a thing as a win-win situation ? If we open our eyes and look at a light bulb, we see the light coming out of the light bulb, and not just physical light, it’s also spiritual light. The light that comes out of the light bulb comes from two opposites. One represents the minus and one represents the plus, almost like as battery. So we have two opinions that have a filament between them. By the two of them working together they Create the balance thats called Light for us. The light that brings light instead of a candle, instead of the sunshine.

A win-win situation can happen when both sides get to a point that each person wants the other to be right and they don’t care to be wrong.

The question is how do we get there? Whats blocking us is fear and insecurity, which are the biggest blockages that exist in people’s lives. When you are either afraid or insecure or need to prove a point, it’s a blockage. If you are so sure of yourself you don’t have to fight with someone about direction or how to get to a certain place. If you need to fight about those little things it’s passive ego. There is active ego, which is immature ego, which is easy to fix when I say I’m the best; and there is a more concealed ego where I think to myself I am the worst and then I cause fights and problems and im afraid people will find out im not that smart.

Win-win situations can only happen when you know who you are, you are sure of yourself and you don’t need to fight or prove a point. Then both of you are winners because both of you feel comfortable just being you.

Think about a situation that you have with someone that you are in a fight with now. Why are you fighting ? You are fighting because its very important to let them know that you are right and they are wrong. Why is it so important to you to get that approval from them? It could be that it has something to do with your self worth.

We need to be secure and brave enough to say “You’re Right” or “I’m Sorry “ when it’s the right time. There is no reason for for fighting or war. There’s always a way and a skill that can be learned on how to bring a person to work together with you.

After all confidence is not something you are born with. Confidence is a practiced skill. When people tell you that introverts are shy and extroverts are secure, I personally don’t believe in that because I am an extrovert and it took me time for me to get out of my insecurity and every time someone would challenge my insecurity I would be upset and it would create waves among people who I was not nice to as a result. Most of the time both POV’s are right. Its just that you are seeing the picture from one angle and they see the picture from a different angle.

If we find a way to listen to the person in front of us we would be able to see that they are right but we are so upset, and we want to get our own point across that we are not capable of hearing each other.

Alignment, Spirituality and Relationships

Our Relationship with everything is a wonderful subject. The first thing that comes to my mind is how we are in tuned with everything around us. I believe, based on a book that was written 2,000 years ago, that the origin of everything is sound, noise, our voices. The vibrations that the voice created eventually created the universe as we know it. Alignment is something we need to do with the vibrations of the universe, together with the vibrations of people around us. Understanding that according to the ancient wisdom of Kabbalah and the chakras our body has certain vibrations. Seven, according to the Chakras and ten according the sefirot of Kabbalah. What does this mean? We need to be aware that whatever we think, say or do vibrates. Its not just the words vibrating from the vocal chords, your actions vibrate from your hands and your thoughts vibrates as a whole. So our thoughts and awareness vibrate in everything around us.

If a person is jealous, lazy or only thinking about themselves, the vibration they are activating is inviting all types of black holes into their lives. They become a black hole and everything around them that has a black hole finds them. For example if im in a bad mood and I can’t get rid go it , I’m thinking all day of “poor me” then misery loves company and we start to invite that kind of vibration into out life. The minute I transform that “poor me” into taking responsibility and see what I can do about , just thinking about it, without saying or acting upon it yet, just the thought is already starting to invite the right people, right situation , right animals , minerals, etc into my life. Through that our words and actions start to change. Start with your mind, your thoughts. Find your way of meditation. The magic of self care is to understand that I am first changing my thoughts , words and actions. The thoughts are the most important part and the words and actions will follow.

The friends that will come into you life will be the right friends. Otherwise you will find yourself with the wrong people. You do not want the wrong people in your life . Making friends when you are in a black hole and in a victim.com personality you will make friends , but those people will make you suffer for the rest of your life. Change and transform and through that bring and make new friends. A lot of us need to be aware if on out spiritual journey we are busy with our ego. Most of us when we are busy with our ego we tell our kids or friends that they should lower their ego . We need to mention that ego has two sides. The inner ego and the external ego. People with external ego are the people that we usually tell to come down and ground themselves. People with an inner ego are people who hate themselves. That too is ego. They are only busy with themselves. We need to check where we are coming from ? Are we coming from inner ego which means you don’t like yourself ? Or do you suffer from external ego?

External ego means you like to show off and its time to come down to the ground. Work with plants, clean the dishes, do things that have to do with the physical kingdom. If you suffer from inner ego, most likely you are already doing the dishes , folding the laundry and cleaning the toilets. What you have to do is raise yourself from the world of action to the world of talking and thinking. Make sure you empower yourself. Start verbalizing how great you are. Say, “Im amazing”, “I’m unbelievable ” , “I’m one of a kind!” All of these affirmations will give you the inner strength you need. The inner strength is already there. You don’t have to create it, but its covered, and that’s why it needs to be discovered! Removing the covers that cover your inner strength. How do you know when your inner strength has been activated? When you start seeing the good in people. Through being completely aligned you will be able to share your opinion from a place of giving not receiving which was the original intent of the Creation of the universe.


Known for his keen sense of humor, contagious smile and extensive ability to simplify esoteric wisdom, Eliyahu employs a multitude of spiritual tools when sharing his teachings. His lectures, mentorships, seminars and soul readings have taken him around the world as his vision and guidance create a roadmap that deeply motivates and inspires others. Eliyahu translates profound spiritual wisdom into practical advice to empower you to live your happiest and most fulfilled existence.

Purification and Certainty

Chukat comes from ‘chok‘, which means the law. The beginning of the portion is about the Red Heifer, which is purification from death.

What are we getting pure from? Death. Every human being has the energy of the Angel of Death around them, that’s why we die, until we can purify the body. The soul doesn’t need purification, it’s already pure. The body is not pure, it has an aspect of left column, desire to receive for the self alone, that’s why it’s not pure. Until the body is pure a person cannot achieve the original prophecy of Ezekiel – immortality.

On Mt. Sinai we lost 5 letters in the Hebrew alphabet that had to do with immortality. If you take ‘par’ (pey, resh) you get 280, and the hey, which is 5, is a code for the 5 final letters. When they call it red heifer, it’s a code for how you build a structure of purification. We need to understand there is a chance to get purified this week. The Zohar says, when a person goes to purify himself, the Angels help him. When a person comes to do something negative, the angels will help with that, too. Why is there a support system to do negative things? The free will is up to us. What we do with our life is up to us. There is no guessing what’s good or bad, we have choices in life to do whatever we would like to do.

Certainty means, your desire and the Crea-tor’s desire becomes one. If it doesn’t work, you know it’s the best thing that ever hap-pened to you. You can’t use certainty to ma-nipulate God. Certainty works only when it’s good for you? That’s not purification. Whatev-er situation you’re in – that’s what’s best for you. Cannot be just how you want it. What kind of relationship do we have with God? Religion is based on promising you, if you will behave, be a good boy or girl, you might get candy – if you don’t get it now, it will wait for you in the Garden of Eden. What a marketing plan!

Every person has a test. You need to know that God knows everything that’s going to happen. It’s the free will to know you chose to do the best you can with your knowledge. Go for it, don’t be worried. Inject certainty, say it’s funny, laugh, smile, deal with it. Things will happen more than you can believe.

Love to you all,

The Power of Speech and Actions

There was a disagreement between Moses and Korach this week.

What was the argument about? The Zohar explains that Korach was chasing something that didn’t belong to him. When a person chases something that doesn’t belong to him even what belongs to him disappears.

What can we learn from this ? Korach was challenging Moses with some questions. If a person is a holy and knowledgeable person does he still need faith and certainty in the Creator ? And if a person has total faith in the Creator does he still need knowledge ? For both questions Moses answered absolutely yes.

Why? Because our spiritual knowledge , our Torah , the way we understand things has two paths. One is the certainty and belief system and the other is the knowledge. We need both ways. If a person just believes , one day he may stop believing and everything will fall apart. If a person just has knowledge then as the Tikkunei Zohar says he will become dried out, he doesn’t have the warmth of faith.

What can we learn from this? Many times we get jealous. Where does the jealousy come from? We see that someone has a better life and we think the Creator forgot about us. We think they have a better life than us , a better house than us and it must be a mistake and we need to correct it. The Creator is everywhere! So when we get jealous the other person is not the problem! The punishment of jealousy is the jealousy itself! If I find myself getting jealous of another person it’s not that jealousy is wrong morally , it’s that moment I am losing faith and certainty in the Creator. A person has to make himself strong and say to himself that there is a reason for everything, that the pain that a person goes through is part of a bigger picture.

Korach in the end when the earth opened and started swallowing him up, said something beautiful; he said Moses is real and the Torah that Moses is teaching is real. He was capable at the end of his life to see that all his suspicions were wrong. He realized that it wasn’t Moses’ idea to wake up one morning and decide to become a leader or to make his brother a Cohen. It was all an exact plan from the Creator.

What we want from this week is to get to a place where we get along with each other. Moses and Korach were the reincarnation of Cain and Abel and for many generations they have come back to correct the same situation.

Love to you all,

Hear No Evil, See No Evil Say No Evil. The Three Monkey Syndrome

We are living in a society today where the metaphor of these three Japanese monkeys is very significant. Growing up I was always attracted to these clever little fellows, not realizing how ancient their image and message actually is.

Originally, they were designed to urge people coming to their local Shines to remember not to do evil, speak evil or set their sights on evil doing.  But since my childhood it seems they have morphed into representing a silent message, which represented a value in just not getting involved, keep a low profile, “go along to get along”, and don’t make a big deal out of it”. I I am sure you can add similar captions!

It strikes me as a very poignant symbol for an acceptable passivity on one hand and a tendency to accept a “group think” mentality on the other, which is attracting us as a means of distancing ourselves from getting involved in anything uncomfortable, despite obvious chaos and negativity all around us.

How do we get beyond the attitude if it doesn’t involve me, I don’t want to get involved!  We are letting ourselves become a set of monkeys whose mantra has become, I don’t want to hear about it, I don’t want to see what’s wrong, let along speak up to try and change anything.

Abuse and bullying and taking advantage of the weak exists everywhere. The rich, the powerful and the smart are teaching us not to be a victim because if we go deep enough we will find out we are all victims to something. But becoming a victim is not what we are about. What we need to be about is teaching those who are truly too weak to fight for themselves how to become strong and independent.

You need to understand the beginning of responsibility is to open your ears your eyes and your mouth and move away from the Three Monkey Syndrome plague of avoidance.

One of the things we see parents dealing with today is very encouraging. Parents are recognizing the importance of teaching their kids how to talk listen and see. Then when they become teachers themselves, will they face a society where they are told to be quiet and not say anything?.

We live in a society where the freedom of the individual no longer exists.

While you are reading this article please ask yourself if there is something you need to say, hear or look into, because there are many people at this very moment who are being taken advantage of by others, not just politicians or rich people.. Even opinions that you hold should be questioned, they are not yours really, they just become your because you’re not willing to take a stand to agree or disagree with something, or you’re not happy with how it infringes on your personal agenda or ready to look away from something.

For that reason, I fear the Three Monkey Syndrome is controlling and manipulating us in ways we haven’t fully recognized. Today more than ever we have to speak up for things that are wrong, if not for us for our neighbor, our community.

As responsble people we are called to look and see where there is pain and remove it from society. We have to listen. The Second World War took a big price out of the world financially and socially, many women became widows, many children lost their fathers. The beginning didn’t seem so bad, but because of the Three Monkey Syndrome we didn’t stop it early enough.

If this dilemma is of interest I highly recommend you read Martin Buber about preconceived notions of the young generation.

We are not making a strong enough effort to shape our own opinions, We too often just don’t want to be bothered. The real problem is happening because some religious organizations are too quick to feed people with hatred while they are talking about peace. They feed people animosity towards each other while they are teaching about God. The goal of God is to become unified.

People cover themselves with the shield of David, the cross, Zen, Buddhism, it doesn’t matter what you follow if around you there is pain that either you caused, or you don’t bother to address. No matter what spiritual path you practice, it is not spiritual, but rather it’s a selfish path if it doesn’t lead you to Love Your Neighbor as Yourself.

In the end of the day, we have to look at what the three monkeys really represent; i can’t see this pain anymore, I can’t hear about it and I can’t be quiet about it. When we get to this level then we can see hear and listen. There’s so much pain that’s happening all over the world. Mistakes in hospital, corrupt lawyers, putting innocent in prison, police shooting and killing people for no reason, bloodshed, terrorist’s attacks, mistakes of religious abuse using the name of God to make everyone their slave, we could go on and on. If we continue sitting and saying if I make a change it will hurt me and my family, we are no more than these monkeys. We cannot be oblivious any longer. We need to see the truth and speak up and made sure we are heard.

May god help us all to unite and make a difference in the world,

Secrets to Spiritual Success

Every desire that we have is not just a passing desire that’s been influenced by external events or people. It’s a desire that’s been awakened from above.

What was created first? The desire for a mother to feed her child or the child’s desire to eat? Of course the desire for the mother to give was first and that’s why the child had the desire awaken within him.

Why am I mentioning this here? Because life everywhere in all aspects is about a mother and child. Meaning you should be aware of your receiving force as it relates to two things: The mother has enough milk and the more milk she’s giving you the more milk she’s creating. If you will be to worried about your receiving force from a place of not having you are effecting the milk of the mother. So the true receiving is you want to have something you don’t have or do you want to receive the milk your mother wants to give you. Now lets take it to the business aspect.

So when you are going to a business deal do you negotiate because you think you don’t have money or do you do it because you know that they want to give you money. This is a new approach to your success. The difference between a successful person and a non successful person is the approach . Are you approaching things because you know that the universe wants to give it to you or because you think you don’t have.

Now in the course of our daily life we will experience two types of awareness;

Awareness that comes from below, and awareness that comes from above.

Awareness that comes from below is connected to lack and the thought  that I don’t have and that’s why I want. Awareness that comes from above means that you are aware that the universe wants to give you so much and that’s why you want it.

The purpose of life is to connect to the awareness coming from above, or more specifically to connect to the fulfillment that’s coming from above and build a desire for it.

There is a constant relationship happening between us and the Creator. Where the Creator wants to awaken us to the endless fulfillment of his giving.

It is up to you to choose your thought process. Is your life going to be successful because the fulfiller wants to give you everything or is your life going to be successful because you think you need to manipulate the situation. If you look into it both ways will bring you the success you want but only one way will bring you true fulfillment which means happiness.

So the first step to start connecting to your true potential that the Creator wants to give you, is to check if what you want is coming from an inner place of lack or an inner place of fulfillment. I want to receive it because I know that the Creator wants to give it to me.

A red flag of a negative desire would be for example jealousy or feeling lonely or having fears, i.e. wanting a relationship because I’m lonely or wanting to have money because I’m poor.

Of course that approach has to change.  Meaning you need to know that if you are lonely and you are trying to draw people in your life so your loneliness will go away, there are three things that might happen to you ;either you will draw lonely people like you, or people who are not connected to you so you can control them, because of your loneliness and you really wont have a connection to them it will be empty, or you will end up at home with your fantasies of how life could have been much better if you had somebody, which will lead you to depression and sadness.

The lesson we have from this is that it’s enough to know that the

Creator wants to give us fulfillment and celebrate and get excited like It’s already there, then having excitement about desiring something that you don’t have. Meaning knowing that the fulfiller of the universe has all in store for you should excite you more than the desire of wanting something you don’t have and the excitement after you achieved your dreams. For example your goal this year is to make a certain amount of money. The desire is matching up exactly to how much the Creator wants to give. So here comes the big question, Can I desire more than what I want ,if the fulfiller wants to give me everything? And the answer simply is, it depends.  Do you really have it in you and you feel, know and are certain that it’s already there. If you don’t believe it’s already there then your body and your soul will not allow you to lie, and it will not go well. So it’s something you have to meditate on and to feel what is your fulfillment, not your desire.

The prayer should be as follows, and please recite it every morning in your own language;

“I’m praying to the higher wisdom of the Master of the World that you wake up within me the desire to receive the intelligence and the crowns that the Creator of the world wants to give me.”


The Power of ACCEPTANCE by Eliyahu Jian

Vital Transformation’s senior kabbalist, Eliyahu Jian shares a secret about the concept of acceptance for those who find it difficult to connect to the Divine. How are they related? Read on…

We all have a concept of acceptance Eliyahu explains, acceptance by others, acceptance by God, accepting ourselves, our values. It is one of the fundamental aspects of interacting in this world.

If we look at our universe, one of the most important things that people are looking for is to be accepted. We all get excited to say “I’ve been accepted to college”, why? It signifies a level of achievement. People want to feel accepted whether it is to a college, a club, a group of friends in the neighborhood, or even our own family.

The question is why? Where does it all begin? Where is that drive to be accepted come from? Why do you want to be accepted?
Every teenagers and child exhibit a thirst to be accepted. It is a driving force no matter what your age or gender.

Nothing is more powerful. Why?

A wife wants to be accepted by her husband and the husband the wife. Children want to be accepted by the parents, parents want to be accepted by the children. We all live in with that drive called desire to be accepted.

We dress a certain way to be accepted into the milieu we want to attract. Let’s take a spiritual look at this driving force for acceptance and I can’t stress the importance for you seeing the connection between that feeling within us and God the creator.

According to all forms of spirituality, there is a basic tenet about the same three forces : you have the creator, meaning the divine, the individual and the “other”, meaning another person. The three components to genuine connection and healthy, well balanced relationships.
Now what does that have to do with acceptance? Whether by God or the other person or myself?

What is missing in the world today? Connection. Connection to a force, something higher, connection to the divine, connection to an understanding of the Divine.

When we are connected to a Divine source, we carry that awareness into our relationships. We know how it can make a difference. But it is even deeper than that. When we connect to that divine source and recognize we are totally accepted by that force we call the Creator, that shift in consciousness of feeling totally accepted by the Creator is going to have a powerful affect on how we communicate with others and what we perceive about other’s communication with us.

The biggest crime within is that we are so busy to see who is accepting us instead of developing an “angel” within us that will urge us to accept other people!

All day long we’re busy looking for who is accepting us instead, who is giving us approval.

I was in Italy one time and I was sitting next to a family, the wife wasn’t getting positive acceptance from the husband, she got that energy from the airport security guard who gave her a compliment.

Sometimes we become thirsty for love that is always approving. Thirsty for acceptance, feeling important, validated, feeling we have value to our spouse, family friends. But there is a hidden danger there that you lose touch with your belief in a higher force, a connection with whoever serves to fills us up with affirmation. So where do we go?

You start looking for acceptance from anyone who will provide it. Who will give you that fortifying energy? It isn’t a sin. I see many husbands going through the same thing.

They are not getting compliments from their wife, so right away they fall into the addiction of seeking acceptance, approval from outside. So they look for any woman in the room who will tell them how great they are. And then they get fulfilled, but what they are forgetting is that there is a higher force who can provide an infinite source of that kind of acceptance.

Do you believe that that higher force called the Creator, the Divine or whatever language you want to call it who accepts you? Genuinely accepts you just the way you are? Or do you believe that that force called the Divine is not accepting you?

Too often we secretly don’t believe it. So we are look for a little attention from a human being and you will undoubtedly get it and then 5 minutes later you will be empty again. It’s the number one cause of cheating. People don’t cheat because they hate their partner. People cheat because they want to be accepted. They want to be accepted, they want to be loved, but if they feel their wife or their husband or their partner is not accepting them they don’t call it cheating, they are looking for love somewhere else.

There are many couples who cheat on each other; I ask them how did it start? It always starts in the same way. Their love life goes on empty they don’t feel accepted by their partner so they have to go somewhere else
Think about it, if you feel truly feel you are accepted by the Divine you have enough power to restrict looking elsewhere for it. So if at least 50% of you is fulfilled up with that comfort of being accepted by the Divine, it is enough to insulate you from feeling ignored by your partner, your friends, your community.

One of the most important things is not to have self doubt about the fact that the Divine, the Creator is accepting you. Never doubt it. Once you doubt it everything starts to fall apart. You need to feel how you are accepted by the Creator just as you are.

Otherwise we go into the two player game and that is where you set yourself up for disagreement. If you make it three, you, the Creator and another, only good can come from it.

So, what to do if you feel guilty and so you feel God is judging you? The sin for which you feel guilty is giving you the feeling of not being accepted. Whenever you do a mistake you have to believe the Creator loves you unconditionally. Our own self-loathing creates a blockage, a curtain between us and the Creator.

What if you don’t even believe in a God? The act of accepting others has amazing ability to connect us to the Creator. How? We see someone doing something negative at that moment you stop accepting them. You disconnect from them and then you are no longer acting as the Creator.

So what happens? When we disconnect from others we disconnect from God ourselves. God is sending you “wrong people” every day. Those wrong people are coming for one reason, to make sure that you learn to accept them as they are and when you do, you will be able to accept yourself as you are.

If you don’t accept yourself you will not be able to feel how the Devine can accept you the way you are. It is a unique concept that can change the world. Ultimately people who are depressed have disconnected from those around them and failed to accept others with their frailties and thus they have become even unaccepting of themselves.

I know a person who would rather be poor and miserable, no love life, just so people give him attention. And the shortest way to get there is being visibly needy, sick and choosing that rather than helping themselves. “Victim.com” soliciting pity so people give them energy.

Not accepting responsibility for ourselves is a painful lesson. Accepting responsibility can change your life overnight! We draw all kinds of negative situations into our life by our need to feel and extract acceptance by others.
What are you drawing into your life? Remember the cure is in accepting others. Look at your life and ask yourself who are you unwilling to accept.

We can’t shift gears and move forward without acceptance. When Jesus went around curing people with Leprosy, he accepted them the way they were and miracles happened.

Sometimes we have to go through a test, a hell on our way to Heaven. Why? If you look at that tough time you learned to accept yourself. It is the time we really discover ourselves. When you learn to accept yourself you can accept that God too is embracing you with acceptance.

The first step is accepting ourselves then feeling the acceptance of the Creator and then recognizing others acceptance. The tool to use to start accepting yourself is to begin to accept those who you had previously not accepted as they are.

The beautiful things about Kind David, he was a shepherd before he became a king. He accepted himself as a Shepherd and didn’t look for external acceptance. That was his secret and thus he accepted others. What makes you a king is the power of acceptance.

In the beginning of creation the Divine wants to give us everything. Why don’t we have it? As the receiver of God’s grace we are not yet there with our certainty that we can have everything. Our lack of acceptance makes us feel underserving down deep. Acceptance induces us to take responsibility despite the suffering to become our authentic selves. The creator wants to give us everything, but we need to be there with a heart full of acceptance.

Where ever we are right now think how the universe was created just for us.
With that self confidence that we are accepted we can show tolerance to others as well. When we accept ourselves our present situation we begin to see how we can take a step in a new direction.

What price are we paying to be accepted by others, to be approved by others? Knowing now that you are accepted by the Creator you can let go of the need to conform to get approval. It frees you to be you!

Moses received the Torah from God, but it says Moses “gave” the Torah giving of the Torah but from Moses point of view it was receiving, Ultimately it is all one because we are living in a universe of ups and downs, we get stuck.

Anger issue? So accept it. Then you can change it. Come and talk to me if you want support to take the first step of self-acceptance, I will be glad to help you get started. It is the first step to truly connecting to the Divine!